And Now I Know

So, I google things. I google things for my mother, who just thinks I know everything and must go on Jeopardy THIS SECOND, I google things for Max's school stuff (way handier than that giant set of World Books ever were,) I google things I think I might have caught after having some unknown but completely germ-infected person cough on my hair in Wal-Mart (reason #547 to keep hand sanitizer on person at ALL times. I thought about taking a swig right then...) I google movie stars, I google TV stuff, the other day, I googled to see if Pavarotti was alive or dead. As we suspected, the tenor has gone to his great reward. (Hey, with all this blatant google love, I should at least be getting paid for this. Damn, I need to google and see if I can get retroactive bloggy bling...)

Oh yeah, the point of this whole post: (cliff's notes people: start your pamphlet HERE:) I surf about in the blogosphere, and I try to keep up with the latest vernacular. Listening outside my son's bedroom door only gets me so far, and currently includes the inner workings of the Bakugan (google THAT!) universe, so I do look stuff up on a more or less regular basis. Well. I've occasionally run into the expression ZOMG. Now. I am down with OMG, got it. Even got OMFG, which is my scatological favorite, it gives such a satisfying cursing while praying kind of a jolt. The kind of thing one would say after giving birth to a demon child, for instance.

Oh yeah, ZOMG. Not even with my twisted fertile minefield of a brain (you don't wanna step THERE...) could I come up with WTF did THAT mean. And I made several rounds around several blocks before giving up and going for the g-word. I thought, Scooby Doo Reference? Zoinks OMG? Aminal gathering- Zoo OMG? Maybe obscure musical instrument - Zither OMG? Postal angst - Zipcode OMG? Pasta exclamation/Sopranos reference - Ziti OMG? Antibiotic outburst - Zithromax OMG? (Okay, so I'm running out of z-blocks in my head...) So I surrendered and googled. I was both relieved and a tiny bit disappointed to learn that it is a Halo reference. ZOMBIE OMG. Maxwell has yet to get to Halo level in gaming -- being eight and all that, and Chuck's more a Madden '09 kinda guy. So. I googled ZOMG. And now I know.